STOP THE WAR COALITION
07 September 2010
Email office@stopwar.org.uk Tel: 020 7801 2768
Web: http://stopwar.org.uk
Twitter: http://twitter.com/STWuk
LEADING ARTISTS SAY NO TO BLAIR'S TATE MODERN PARTY
Tracey Emin, Vivienne Westwood, Brian Eno and Katharine Hamnett are among the many artists and designers who are objecting to the Tate Modern art gallery hosting a party on Wednesday 8 September at which Tony Blair will be celebrating the publication of his memoir, A Journey.
Stop the War's demonstration outside the gallery from 5.30, calling for no war criminals at the Tate Modern, will be joined by artists and other public figures.
Art "happenings" and other events are planned for the protest, including the appearance of a pack (substitute your own collective noun) of Tony Blairs.
If you are joining the protest, feel free to bring your own imaginative expressions of outrage at one of Britain's foremost art galleries hosting a party for someone who should be indicted for the illegal war in Iraq that has killed hundreds of thousands of civilians.
NO WAR CRIMINALS AT TATE MODERN
PROTEST FROM 5.30PM WEDNESDAY 8 SEPTEMBER Tate Modern Gallery, Park Street, Bankside, London SE1 9TG.
Nearest tube Mansion House
Whether it be a lover, a friend or a family member. Over the years you invest in that relationship just as you invest your hard earned money into the bank. Over the years the account grows and the more you invest, the better it becomes.
Then one day the bank / friend needs something from you and you decide to invest a special amount - maybe help them move house or help during a challenging time in their life and you are there for them, you invest more as you know that the account it a strong and good one.
Then one day you need help yourself with something and - hopefully, the account is strong enough to take your withdrawal - your need of help from that relationship, and it still stands strong and firm as you have both appreciated and valued the input from both sides into this account and you both know the value built up over the years, and so it stands strong.
Sadly sometimes after years of your investing in a relationship, that person can turn away at the most important time for you when things are going really badly and you really need and want that relationship to be there for you and in the end, they turn away and you find the account is not only empty - but closed - and you are left devastated.
This happened to me a while ago when someone I considered to be a very VERY dear and deep friend of nearly 20 years standing, where I have ALWAYS been there for him, and where I have asked very little in return - completely turned against me when I was having a complete and utter emotional melt down over a lover and while I admit it was really ugly and awful beyond words, finding the account closed and empty and a complete rejection of any kind of investment over the years, just made things worse than ever and caused SO MUCH MORE PAIN.
Sorting through things and coming out the other side - alone and with absolutely no help from my friend at all, for he vanished and cut me off without s single opportunity to talk and find resolution between us, and after helping him for almost 2 decades sort his life out, offering a free home many many times, lending money because he had overspent and his boyfriend would have been angry, feeding, collecting, having his whole family for Christmas, taking him to his Fathers funeral, and a million other things I have invested - deeply and with love and great affection as a friend - in our relationship, to find a back turned on me so quickly and with such coldness, especially as this was the VERY FRST TIME I had EVER asked for any kind of support in this manner, EVER, was devastating.
Since then, several other friends have backed him up and I seem to get the blame when it was me who was drowning - me who was in despair and me who was hurting and all that has happened is I have been left - abandoned - buy the very person who I trusted and whom I had invested heavily in, and all he has done is move onto the next person who can help, - another of my friends who at the time stated my melt-down was just 'BORING - BORING' - who is the next person to offer a home, a car, a helping hand and seems not to have looked at what he has done - and how he has caused hurt and pain for someone who was drowning, and I am truly stunned.
I had more trust, hope and love in the human race and if someone you trusted and relied upon can so easily walk away and turn their back on someone who is hurting and who has done so much for them over the years and just be cruel because they cannot be grown up enough to offer the very thing they have taken over the years - help and guidance - then I truly despair for humanity as I truly despair for Johnny.
I suppose the TV programme has something to do with it, as well as the good weather , the fact we are the only exclusively gay mens hotel in Bournemouth and - probably - on the south coast, we have been here for 10 years and have a lot of regulars and this web site is doing so well on google ratings, as we have had a really good summer so far and packed houses almost all the way through since June. It's been a really good summer season.
So we have some more double glazing going into another 4 rooms and this now only leaves me with 2 rooms or 3 windows yet to do, and considering the size of the place... is not bad going. Some years ago I had a quote for the whole place to be done and I just laughed when the guy told me how much as there was absolutely NO WAY - and with the price of gas and electricity on average going up 43% in the last 18 months, it has become a necessity - that and the fact that some of the window frames were rather old and rotten... and with VAT going up in January and as I met a gay guy locally who has become a friend who does double glazing ( oh how useful...) he has been busy with us ... ha ha
The gardens were also re decked and sorted and more space made available for guests by taking out some old and tatty bushes and decking the area... every little helps when you don't have a lot... ( something I have never said before... brag brag )
It is really never dull around here and living the lifestyle we lead is often a fantasy to many as after all, who wouldn't want to own and run a gay mens clothing optional hotel and mix with so many stunning guys all year... have sex every day with someone new, lounge about in the garden all day getting sun, enjoiy a dinner party every night with new and fun people, and generally have fun...
NOW FOR THE FACTS:
We do get stunning guys here and I enjoy every single person who visits regardless of age and size and anything, as I believe everyone to be worthy. SEX: ha ha ... not had sex in ages and in fact, in the last couple of years - er maybe even 5 years - I doubt I have had as many sex partners as I had as an escort on an average single day... so not very good huh... I think there have been 2 this whole summer... and then, very few people are brave enough to 'take me on' and tend to expect me to do all the bloody work - and who the hell has the energy these days for sex... after a15 - 18 hour day - 7 days a week, who has time and energy for sex... I fall asleep as soon as I sit and watch the news, let alone as soon as my head hits the pillow. ( sad old thing...)
I have sat in the garden and got sun ONCE this year - for an hour. I do walk Missy ( the dog ) every afternoon for an hour and visit some truly lovely places together as Bournemouth really is the garden town and full of the most delightful places to visit and all within 5 minutes drive from here ( want to join me any day around 1pm ? ?) and with the late nights and early mornings every day, we really appreciate it when we do have a quiet spell or a single morning when there is either no one in or guests have told us they will not be down early for breakfast, and oooo you do so enjoy a lay in... but it doesn't happen often...
But I love it. I don't miss the sex and I thoroughly enjoy the work and am delighted in every moment and Hamilton Hall is hugely respected and valued by so many and that alone thrills me. That we can help create an 'urban oasis' for so many - a refuge - a tranquil space to re charge and a place to make friends and feel safe in, is a delight.
Even Hamilton Hall herself loves us here. I talk to the house and garden all the time ( batty old witch ) and her aura is so inviting and is mentioned so often as soon as people walk through the front door.
Since the TV programme we were in, some of the neighbours have stopped and talked, people I have not even seen before as I am in a lot, and they ave said how much they loved the programme and I show them around the rooms and they have always been delightful and delighted and it is good to know some people locally. As an scort in London I knew few neighbours as I didn't want them asking questions and my privacy was because of my business and Ham Hall was much the same for many years, but since 'outing my venue' on national and international TV - masses of people who would never know we were a gay mens venue, now do, and seem to absolutely love it.
Kristian or as we call him here - Dobby - ( who is Harry Potters house elf / slave ) has been amazing as well. he works so well and so long and never complains or even takes a day off and is my right hand man ( ooo maybe not my right hand man... I think he would cringe at the thought of doing that... ha ha even though I do remind him that there are many who use to pay to be my 'right hand'... ha ha - if you get the gist...) and he works and entertyains and laughs and is marvelous, truly a God send.
We have the rest of August to go as it's only the 7th today - and knowing how fast it goes - and then its' September and then October and the nights will start drawing in and it'll be getting darker earlier and earlier and we shall be shutting ourselves away in the warm and wearing extra layers and complaining about the c-c-cold... and we must remember this lovely summer, these long fun filled days and take them into the winter with us to keep us warm on the inside and smiling on the outside....
'3 IN A BED' - Channel 4 - Wednesday April 28th & August 15th 2010
I cannot even begin to tell you what an amazing outcome we have had since appearing in the Channel 4's - '3 IN A BED' programme last April 28th 2and again August 15th 2010. The outpouring of love, admiration, friendship, respect and honour sent to us through e mails, phone calls and people stopping us in local shops and bars having recognised us - has been awesome. I have felt truly mooved and humbled.
The programme has put us on the map at last. We were already well known in the gay circles but we are now offered a level of respect from the straight community that had no idea we were here. We have been the most talked about gay mens hotel in the UKfor a long time - some love us and a few hate us - but we are now accepted in a very different light as a venue that is trying to offer something right - something for all the right reasons.
I have watched the original programme 5 or 6 times now, and the newer longer version a couple of times, not to see me, but to see it through different perspectives... What and how the 76 year old Granny who wrote asking if she could adopt me - might make of it and why. What the guys in the gay bar in Spain - booing at Andrew and cheering me, made of it and why - What they thought of a gay man on the telly standing up to the bigot and speaking his mind ? What the women and her 3 children thought as they watched and phoned almost before the programme was over to congratulate us on our standing up to Andrew - and so on... and this has been a great learning curve for me.
You see - I like me in the programme. I am not often that calm and things were a little more heated between Andrew and myself and cleverly and professionally edited. The absolute truth prevails - just some of the woffle that he kept blabbing and my annoyance with this has been removed, and I like me - and watch and learn that this is who I can be - this is who I am - although there are times when even I get in my own way and this programme has been a huge lesson for me in this manner. I am truly thankful to Studio Lambert for this.
Even in early August - 3 months after the original programme went out, I was recognised in Aldi by a women who congratulated me - saying that the 'other guy was a tosser' ( her words ) and that I handled him brilliantly, and I always laugh and say it was well edited... and my 15 minutes of fame lingers on.... and I'm having such a giggle with it... ego - NAH ! - I'm like a big kid having a laugh and sharing it with my friends...'I'm a TV star you know...' over and over... makes them mad... and we laugh...
We approached the gay media wondering if they'd do an article... no interest at all... so fuck 'em. When 95% of our business comes through the internetand the gay media gagging for advertising revenue and they still offer an arrogant asinine service to their advertisers, just as they have done when we needed them as there ws nowhere else, it is no wonder their revenue from advertising is so down and they are gagging for our business. The gay media does not have a very good reputation with their advertisers for bad service, dreadful attitude and arrogance.
I also owe a huge gratitude to Kristianwho worked tirelesly to get Ham Hall all lovely and spotless for the filming, as he always does, and despite what one asshole in the film claimed, the place is highly maintained and very well cleaned ( just remember that when watching the programme ) and Kristian wasn't even able to join me at the other venues as we couldn't find the key to his ball and chain attaching him to Ham Hall, and the Director had asked if we minded sharing a bed at the first venue as it didn't have room for a seperate room each. It was Kristian who pointed out that they would hardly expect me to share with a female member of staff - and he was right. Who knows what they would have made that look like - Morcombe and Wise sitting up in bed together in our jim jams giggling like two camp old queens ( what do you mean - old ? ) Kristian is the best manager I have ever had here and his ideas and input are continuous and he really is Heaven sent. Ham Hall is a lot of work physically and emotionally and he is brilliant i many ways.
Through Kristian, a local florist had filled the venue with lovely flowers - all free of charge - and CHERISH another local shop, gave wonderful baskets filled with candles, joss sticks etc. all beautifully wrapped with cellophane etc. for each of the participants and even one each for the film crew... and it was delightful. Thanks everyone
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Some of the e mails received from the public:
Hi John, I'm working through all those pre-recorded TV programmes on a lazy bank holiday and came across your episode of 3 in a bed. Just wanted to say I think you're absolutely marvelous in what you have set out to do. For me the programme conveyed your dedication not only to disect the stereotypes of gay and spiritual endevour, but to share the greatest message of all - liberation. The world needs more people like you :-) Much love Mark
HI John
It's been a couple of years since I stayed at your place so I just watched 3 in a bed with interest. You make me proud to be a gay man!! I was filled with pride when iIsaw the programme! You showed the UK what it is all about to be part of a community and to care.
I travel around Asia now teaching massage to the blind -particularly in Vietnam and Cambodia. I returned home for a while and was losing faith in the people here but you have turned that around. I will go on my way with my head held high. Hopefully I will be able to get to Bourenmouth again before I leave for Asia and it will be my privilege to onec again stay at Hamilton Hall.
Absolutely LOVED you and your portrayal of Hamilton Hall on C4 last night and yes I was prejudiced until I LISTENED! You are a natural for TV and I bet you'll have your own show soon! Much love to you and Kristian from Angie
Dear John,
I love you, if only there were more people like you, the world would be a better place.
I am a woman of 60 (almost), married to a wonderful man who is 16 years my junior (I'm the same age as his Mum !) I have a lovely daughter and a wonderful son who just happens to be gay. Like you, we are all happy in our skins and only live to help each other in any way we can. I had to write to you just to let you know that I would be very proud to have you as my son. I can only wish you peace and happiness and for the lord to smile down on your Mum Betty. Keep doing what you're doing. Much Love, Kate x
Hi John & Christian,
If we were all in the same room I'd like to hug you both! And I see from your website that I am by no means alone in wanting to contact you after last night's C4 television programme.
I'm not an eloquent person so my words will be inadequate but....I wish I had as much calm and integrity in my little finger as you have in your whole being! The way you handled that bigotted, repressed, arrogant, deluded, patronising rip-off merchant Andrew, in the calm way that you did was nothing short of remarkable. My husband and I were shouting all sorts of insults at him via the television! If I were him, I'd batten down the hatches for the next few weeks - I can see a backlash towards him from total strangers, just as you are clearly receiving a lot of love from total strangers.
All credit to you both and may you continue to have (& bring) many, many happy times in your wonderful guest house.
With love, Michele. xx
John, I just wanted to leave you a quick note to say how fantastic I found your guesthouse on channel 4 last night. I also felt embarrased, being straight, by the way you were treated by Andrew, I think Mr Brown got the wrong bigot yesterday lol. I have noticed that you might do the odd weekend and if so as my sister said last night we must go. You are a truely remarkable couple and I wish you all the happiness and success in the world. Steve
Hi Guys, Just wanted to say you came across WONDERFULLY on the programme and I am in awe of the great work you do. The attitude you have towards your guests is so welcoming and non judgemental and realistic as to their needs. It really reaffirmed my faith in humanity! You are making a real difference to people's lives and A haven for people and long may you continue :) Love Debbie x
Just wanted to tell you "well done" and how we both admire you ! What an arse of a man ? How did you not throw him out ? You'll no doubt be inundated with congrats and business - the world needs more people like you !
Hi John & Kristian
Thank you so much for presenting such a wonderful (Gay) persona last night on 3 in a bed. I hadn't seen the programme before so didn't know what to expect, except that a gay B&B was going to feature. How you kept your hands off ( in the biblical sense Ha Ha) that bigoted heterosexual was testament to your nature. I am perhaps not the most unbiased person being a out gay man but you certainly handled your self extremely well, showing Andrews true (appalling) nature, his narrow mindedness and his ignorance of not just sexuality but LIFE!!!
If/when we stay in Bournemouth we will certainly try and book a room with you and maybe a course.
Wishing you health and happiness in the future, Pete and Andy.
Hi. I watched the channel 4 programme last night, and just want to say what a fantastic hotel and person you are. My in laws live in Poole so next time we're down we may pay you a visit on a straight weekend, and leave the kids with them. Keep up the great work. XX
Hi John!
Well I must say I thought the program was really good and you were just fabulous! I was a bit fearful of how they would edit it and portray you and Hamilton Hall, but I needn't have worried; you can be very proud of yourself and what you've achieved! A colleague of mine has just said how much she enjoyed it too and how well you came across, and she's sure you will see a surge in business.
Well done and see you soon, Lots of love, Martyn (in Cheltenham)
I really have to share with you that I watched your '3 In A Bed' programme last night with my 3 children aged 14, 10 and 8 and they all got what you were about. That guy Andrew in the programme from The Lodge obviously just did not get what your venue and yourselves were about, but me and my children did. I cannot tell you how it affected me emotionally to see that there are such wonderful, such kind and genuine people like you in the world and how absolutely you blew me away. Sarah
I just want to say well done. I loved the programme and had to get my Mac out and look you up and e mail to say how much I enjoyed the show and your attitude John and what a wonderful person you came across on the TV. It was the most pleasant hours viewing I have had in a very long time. I felt positively charged and glowing at the end, just seeing how you were, what you offer and how you viewed things. I wish i was a man and could vieit, so maybe you'll offer the occasional straight event and I can then bring my husband and enjoy your wionderful Hamilton Hall. Thankyou John. Thankyou. Maria.
Hello, I saw the channel 4 show last night .. I just wanted to say that your retreat/b&b looked lovely and is clearly a great place for your guests to relax in and do the workshops etc. I am a vegetarian but was ashamed of that man's attitude to the others non vegetarianism. Anyway, shame I am a girl or would love to come stay. Take care. Sarah
Hello Jon,
I am a married lady and just wanted to say that I think your Retreat is a lovely place, very tasteful and with a big heart in it. I saw the programme last night and much admired the way that you were upfront and honest, such a rare quality in lots of people these days. I especially liked your responses to Andrew's (groan groan) whinges and clearly you are very passionate about what you do and why you do it. Many Congratulations also for your free stays which are available to people with AIDS and HIV.
Long may your Retreat be in business. Well done!! ( name edited )
Dear John,I watched the program last night.You did very well just beeing yourself and show to the wider audience that Hamilton Hall is a stunning place where gay man can relax and enjoy the relaxed athmosphere.The fact that the str8 couple fully understand the nature of your businis and enjoyed the stay at your place speaks volume.I had come to Hamilton Hall few years ago and enjoyed it very much. Looking forward to vist again very soon. Jovan
Hi John, I am just contacting you to say that I think you are a most wonderful and inspiring human being. I watched you last night in the 'Three in a Bed' show and I was blown away by your sincerity, benevolence and the human kindness which was exuded by you on the show. You handled the negative comments from the other gentleman in such a balanced and positive way, I found your response to him incredibly impressive. I am a woman but have many gay male friends and it is so uplifting for me to know that there is a place like yours available for them and I will be sure to let them know about your facilities as we are crying out for a place like yours here in Ireland, where somebody can be welcomed, supported and reassured. I could feel the love emanting from your establishment just by watching the show and my boyfriend felt the exact same thing. I apologise if I am bothering you; I never normally do things like this but I was just blown away by you and had to let you know! Yours sincerely, Siobhan Higgins. Limerick, Ireland.
Dear John and Kristian
I know your going to have millions and millions of us writing to you ! but I want to thank you so much for the show 3 in a bed ! John your a person whom I just felt I had a huge connection with ! I do NOT know why ! but your persona and humanity were amazing and your opinions so just ! Thank you for doing what you do for the community and the people around you !
Hey guess I had better introduce my self ! my name is ( edited ) I have just moved 2 years ago from South Africa Cape Town where me and my partner! of 18 years had a bed and breakfast for over 5 years ! We moved to the north of England and now live in a very very rural village . We both watched your show and have to say and I am NOT emotional, but your program brought a tear to my eye. What I felt was your like my self very honest very open and you put your self on the line and were so amazing on the show ! Andrew the fat ( closeted ) gay - come on ! - but hey cant say a word there.
How he must of felt an ass ! He needs to come to a weekend at your place, remove his clothes and breath in reality and accept him self ! then the chip will fall off his shoulder and he can really be whom he should be !
John I better stop. All I wanted and had to do was email you to thank you, to ask if maybe we could become email friends !and when we drive over to France come stay a night at your amazing fantastic place. We leave June 24th return July 19th. I think just to be in a room with your self and Kristian would give such amazing energy and warmth, I just do not know, But I had to write.
We are isolated here in this tiny village but also have not found any friends with in the community we live.
But CONGRATULATIONS on your show. You may of not won the tv show but you have won many friends , much respect and so much more love doing it " and for that I had to thank you. I do understand you will have had so so many people who have written and asked the same but hey !your honesty and openness was so amazing .
Thanking You from the bottom of my heart and I am sending you both the biggest love, from with in and strongest energy giving hug that I can through cyber space. Good luck for your future and may it be the and happiest part of your life . What you do for theh gay community is amazing
John and Kristian I will stop now. Love ( name edited )
hi john,i felt i had to drop you a line after watching 3 in a bed last night.i would like to say, i think you are a wonderfull loving,caring genuine person! and wish you all the very best for the future! i felt andrew in the show, has some major hang ups!! and i feel he is a poor excuse of a human being! i am straight,but if im ever in bournemouth,i would love to stay at your b+b! you guys take care,and just keep doin wot you do! ade.
Hi John (and all) just wanted to comment on last nights prog..I loved your hotel and the vision behind it (if I was a gay man) I would be so comforted to know that there are a still few well enlighted human beings in this,sometimes,bigoted world. You are truly a wonderful person and I wish you health and happiness in the future. May your God bless you. Maggie (middle aged,white,straight,mother,granny,human being)xxxxx
Just watched 3 in a bed and thought i should write to tell you what a wonderful job i think you are doing! We need more people out there doing what you guys are doing..You are an inspiration! Keep up the amazing work! Much love. Vicky x
morning, I just wanted to say that I thought you were wonderful last night. You held yourself with such dignity. I am so proud that there are people in the world like yourselves that have found the confidence to stand up for who! you are against, what seems, a constant barrier of unempathic misunderstandings. I myself am straight, but I have close friends who are gay, I do not understand people judging my friends ,but am all to aware of it. I wish you every happiness and every success with your business and your future. I am sure with the exposure on the programme you will have many more happy decades in your home. Best wishes Melanie
Hi John/Kristian Having watched "Three in a bed" I just had to drop you a line. I think your B&B is wonderful, very welcoming, what you offer is incredible, what wonderful people you are. The world would be a much better place, if everyone thought like you guys!! John I have to say you were VERY PATIENT!! with Andrew, God what a judgemental man!! I laughed so much, when you politely lashed him with your words classic!! Anyone who is your friend is lucky to have you, thats all I can say. I love everything gay, and watching you, listening to what you had to say enlightened me. I will finish now, because I tend to talk to much lol. Before I do one more thing, I think it is BRILLANT you were an escort, good for you, your mortgage free how good is that wow! Think I will look into DOM abit more, always wanted my own business thats one way to get it lol. Take care and I wish you both all the best life can bring now and in the future x
Hi John, I just wanted to let you know how impressed I was with what I saw of Hamilton Hall on "Three in a Bed". I think the ethos behind the business is amazing and your satisfaction and joy at running it, and offering such a warm, safe, spiritual place really shone through. I thought it was a great advertisement for your business but also for showing how doing something one is passionate about and really believes in, and giving something back to others, can be really fulfilling. I hope it has inspired other people to investigate how they can change their lives to combine work with pleasure and spirituality.
I thought the bedrooms & communal rooms of Hamilton Hall looked beautiful and calming, and I can imagine the sense of safety and peace that guests must feel when they enter. I also sense that the atmosphere in Hamilton Hall must feel alive with potential for discovery and growth, with the workshops you offer. £75 a night is an incredible rate, given the quality of the B&B and the location - I could hardly believe it! Finally, I am sure you don't need me to say this but I want to anyway, in case you had any doubts after the comments made by one of the guests: as a heterosexual female I have no problem knowing that Hamilton Hall is generally for gay and bisexual men only. It is a beautiful haven and everyone needs and deserves somewhere they can feel safe, to make connections and to grow and discover more about themselves and their potential.Thank you for going on the show and allowing me to have a peep into your world and take away the goodness & joy that flowed through the screen from you to me :) It has really warmed my heart and inspired me - it's so good to know there are people like you, and places like Hamilton Hall, out there!
Best of luck for the future, though I know you don't need it!Kind regards Tertia
Hi John, thank you for sharing your wonderful home with us on 3 in a bed. What a lovely person you are, not like the Avebury boy. I wish you every success and much happiness for the future. Loads of love Glenda x
Dear John,
I have finally managed to sit down and watch '3 men in a bed'. Congratulations on keeping your cool with that arrogant arsehole I think I would have killed him. Hamilton Hall is not perfect but like the other couple I feel one has to take a balanced view and I could not have felt more welcome or 'at home' during my stay earlier this year.
The past year has been difficult for us at our residential home and we have suffered at the hands of an inspector who was more interested in pieces of paper than people. I am so glad that both you and the other couple managed to get across that people are more important than money.
Please keep up the good work, the gay community needs you.
With my very best wishes, Colin
Hi John, thought you were fantastic on tv last night, your warmth came across so well and thats why the fab married couple loved you.........as for that bastard dont know how you kept your cool! I'd have lost it completely, you challenged him really well John........you should have won 2. ps. loved the bath scene! what a star!
Love David xxx
Hello there,
we watched Three in a Bed with particular interest as my gay friend Roger Bolton was the occupant of the Lodge in Avebury for several years before Andrew took over. It was very sad to see what he had turned the interior into and don't even talk about the prices. He has no idea at all that he is even conflicted over his own sexuality and we want to say what an absolute darling you were in your handling of the situation with him.
It made for great viewing we were all in stitches, to us Andre is a real live David Brent plonker, that £18.00 stunt that he pulled was so not on, but it was really funny to watch - sorry I am sure it was dreadful for you but you handled it so well.
We'd like to give you five imaginary gold stars for being a real live saintly like person, and for providing such a fantastic service at your B & B. We live in Ireland at present but a few years ago whilst living in Suffolk I got a bit fed up and wanted to go on a retreat for women. Well not only could I not find one for heterosexual women, I tried a lesbian one once in Glastonbury and that was a weekend to remember - not - but they were all cost prohibitive.
Also, you may be not for profit but I suspect that you are going to be in great demand from the show and as we have seen that you are going do straight couple weekends we will definitely be coming to stay at some time in the future. So we really appreciate what you are doing it must be a bloody godsend for gay chaps. We thought we'd also tell you for a laugh that I am 53 and James the gorgeous is 27 and we have together for 8 years. We will marry after ten years which is what I told him when he asked me when he was 19. Love to all and once again well done to you and to Chris
all the very best D.
John, your a star! what a tosser Andrew! loved the show, loved your place, loved you.... made me think about turning gay! cheers Pete
Hi there, I saw you guys on tv last night. Think you're doing a wonderful thing. That's coming from a straight guy in Ireland. Keep up the good work. Frank
Hi, Just saw you on TV. I'm a hetero man, but loved your B&B, and your philosophy and approach. Quite fancy staying with you, but not sure me and my wife and kids would fit in really! Brilliant, well done, and all the best for the futue. Bottoms Up! TP.
Dear John, Great progam tonight. Ypou won my vote tonight. If I am totally honest I did not get half the workshops, I do however appreciate you have a market to cater for and am sure the sessions are warmly received by your guests.
I did however get your social enterprise scheme. absolutely brilliant - well done you ! More people like you would get this country into a far better state. Shame one of your guests didn't understand - I will have to email him too just to advise him that more social enterprises and community interest companies succeed over private businesses. (should I mention that he would get right on my bloody nerves if I thought I'd steep to pay £250 for his pokey little B&B - ooops sorry - bitch in me came out then)
Good luck to you and hope your B & B ends up celebrating 30 years plus ! JM
Hi John: Just watched three in a bed and wanted to say I think you were the clear winner in many ways. I think what you are doing is wonderful and Andrew came over as a total nob! I know where I would rather stay and I am not a gay man!! Well done you and I wish you continued success, Best wishes. Pauline
Hi John, I just wanted to drop you a line having seen '3 in a Bed' half an hour ago. I think you guys are doing a fantastic job down in Bournemouth (I remember the beach well, I was brought up in Salisbury in the 80s/90s so that was my local beach). You sound like your running a great place for liberated gay guys at home with their sexuality who want to explore that area of their personality a little more - mixing sexuality with spirituality. I'm also really pleased that you mentioned having worked in the sex industry, although I've never had anything to do with it, I think Andrew was a judgemental twat! Best wishes, David
Congratulatons on everything you are doing. I have just watched the 3 in a bed programme and feel sad i am not a gay man! Keep up your great work. Luv Fi
Just wanted to say well done for putting up with Andrew the Arse. What a plonker i just wanted to hit him from the start he said i don't want to judge which is all he did from start to finish. The guy has probably never had a original construct! ive comment or idea in his life, so just insults others for the hell of it anyways enuff of andrew bashing good luck & ttfn
Hi John I just watched the television show on Channel 4, and I wanted to say that what you and your B and B do is really great, the fact that you go above and beyond its fabulous.I wish you much joy and happiness for the future. Nicky
Hi You were fantastic I really enjoyed the programme! I even tried to persuade my wife to let me come down and try hamilton hall but she didn't like the idea, she knows I am a nudist but forgets I told her I was bi when we met. what a wanker that guy was !
£250 a night, he must be mad.You were right the other couple's place was worth the money and more but you have the sea. I do hope i can get down to enjoy the HH in the summer. Gxxx
Hello John & Kristian
My boyfriend and I watched 3 in a bed this evening on C4 and thoroughly enjoyed it. You did the gay community proud. We live up in Staffordshire, and would definitely stay at Hamilton Hall when visiting Bournemouth. Bravo! Nick & Paul : )
Hi John. YOU WERE WONDERFUL!!! We've chatted before, and I think you know I make TV programmes, and I was seriously impressed by you. I know that you're a real, genuine and honest man and that came across in bucketfulls; well done for keeping your cool. Andrew was an enigma, a bizarre attitude (he's watched too much 'hotel inspector'), and I felt he was acting the whole time. His whole demeanor felt like a piss-poor performance, ie the farce at breakfast.
When you suggested he was in denial I was screaming with laughter - I think you're RIGHT!!! As you know, I love big hairy bears and he definately fited the bill. The shots of him in the apron arranging pillows at his place were camp in the extreme. His tucked-in tops and wobbly belly all point to something... food over sex? tucked-in = neurotic attitude to sexuality. I'm sure he's latently homosexual, and fears that if he even contemplated contact with another man there would be no turning back!!! I will visit soon, I promise... Big hugs, Richard xx
Hi there John . Well done mate what a good show you put on - was very impressed how you handled that guy! You showed Hamilton Hall off well - hope you get a lot of returns from the program £250 for the B&B was right out of order!
I am hoping to get to a massage weekend later this year - hee hee get to see more of that body you hid so well in the bath and shower! [ Lucky cameraman!
Keep well - and well done again - you flew the flag well! HUGS. Brian T.
How wonderful to see you on the tv , how inspiring !! Well done ! Sean x
Hi John tonight I watched 3 in a bed and I thought you deserved to win your hotel looks fabulous and I think you work very hard to do what you do I must say Andrew was a scared man like a lot of men who think they are so macho but he just lives in the dark age .
I live in newcastle not far from walkworth which is a very nice place but for money and value your definitely the winner keep up the good work
Well done your a star and were a delight to watch and listen to p.s hope you don't mind me sending this email Lillian E
Hi John,
Just watched the 3 in a bed show and have to write and tell you how fab you are. You are an inspiration to all. You can clearly see that your work is your passion. Its great to see some one do what they believe in and create a wonderful atmosphere for others.
I absolutley love how you've done the place its looks amazing ! Its such a shame im a straight female other wise I would be down there as soon as I had the chance. Your courses on your site look so interesting especialy the breatheasy one, as a spiritulist myself im learning all the time. Keep up the good work and I wish you a happy and prosperous future Love and light. Felicity xxx
Dear John,
Please excuse a stranger just emailing you out of the blue, I dont normally contact people I dont know, however I have just watched the channel 4 program "Three in a Bed", for the first time in my life I am sad I am a woman!! for it means I can not ever stay in your home away from home. Yet this does not in any way diminish my respect for what you and your partner do. Having watched the program it is clear that you offer a place of rest, support and friendship with in a safe, non judgemental environment for the confused, ill or spiritually weakened gay male. As a straight female I have never had to deal with prejudice (as seen on the program from the pompous twit that charges £250 to sleep in the middle of an over grown rockery!!! You handled him with dignity and he was shown up for the money grabbing fool that he is. ) However, I do understand how it might make some one feel, couple that with HIV and I cant begin to imagine how lonely and difficult life might prove for a gay or bisexual man who is trying to battle AIDS. I think that is it so fantastic that you offer a ray of light in the mist of, what must be for many, a dark and unfriendly world. I just wanted to say that I was very touched by your selfless dedication to others. I will for always remember and cite your example to my children and my students. Yours respectfully Wendy xx
Hi John
Am sure you are going to be inundated with emails over the next day or so. We obviously saw you on tv this evening and thought you came across brilliantly, most importantly, you came across as yourself. Andrew was just a pompous stuck up so and so who we didn't like right from the outset ! The other couple seemed really nice and it was lovely to see that they got what you are doing at Hamilton Hall. I have also emailed them to wish them the best and that hopefully at some point in the future may try and pop up there.
It was great that the program really put across what Hamilton Hall is about and hopefully this will mean people that may never have heard of you may now look up your site and make a booking to visit.
Well done John, we are both so proud and hope you reap some rewards from the publicity. As you can see from the time of this email we watched the program quite late, mainly because i was out playing bridge this evening so we sky+'d the program and watched it when i got in :)
Lots of love Stephen xxAQUAVISION MUSIC
Hi John, saw you on the telly tonight and was most impressed by you, your assistant manager, your hotel and your ethos. I would love to come down later this year to visit with you. You offer the exact ambience that I am looking for. Congratulations on being a true human being, and your assistant manager is lovely too! Give each other a big kiss and a hug from me, you're lovely! Ken xxx.
Just wanted to congratulate you on last night’s program. You came across fantastic and that other plonker was indeed in denial and far too far up his own fat arse, excuse the French. Anyway well done, keep up your excellent work providing a much needed retreat, I am sure business will certainly boom now :O) Andrew XXX
Just wanted to say how much i enjoyed '3 in a bed' and how fantastic i think what Hamilton hall represents is a fantastic model in this money driven society..I am neither gay, bisexual, or in need of sexual spirituality..however i want to aplaud you and all you stand for.. Catherine xxxx you should have won!! - strategic actions from that Andrew!
Mr Bellamy Saw the programme last night, just wanted to say thankyou, it's people like you that maintain my faith in humanity. Keep up your excellent work, and ethics. Warm Regards, Lee (Married, Naturist, Sexually liberated and a Homophile)
Hi John,
Just wanted to say that I watched last nights 3 in a bed programme.Gosh,it was like a hollywood blockbuster! It had everything,a baddie(I leave you to work these out) a playful and nice couple,sadness (somebody was crying) and of course (wait for it) a great big STAR !! lol. Yes dear,you were the diva ! I thought it was a good programme,and your views and philosophy in the running of Hamilton Hall came across very well.Well done! What about the prat that ran the £250 a night B+B.I couldn't believe somebody would pay him that.I have stayed in 4 star hotels for less. Good to see you had the last laugh,buying him a book on sex was a master stroke. All the best John ......Richard.x
Hi John and Kristain,
I watched the program last night i do not know how you kept your cool with that pratt Andrew. For a start of who on earth would pay £250 per night to stop at a b-b that only did veggie breakfasts and also pay £75 to go and look at a load of stones like you said that should have been included in the price. What an insult to you both he gave you, your rooms are great i loved my stay with you in the "Love Room" and it is a great retreat for us gays i will be returning again soon hopefully to have a longer stay. All the best Dave
Hi John
Just watched last nitight's episode through Ch4 on demand.
You were magnificent. Totally and utterly. I'm pleased to say you havent changed in any way as far as my memory is concerned. Still a loveable character who does so much for the gay community in so many ways. Sure, not every gay guy will agree with your approach to improving sexuality but that really doesnt matter.
What does matter is what the woman [sorry cant remember name] said when she overpaid you. You offer a safe haven for gay/bi men and you're not in it to rip them off in any way - unlike the majority of so-called gay venues! Well done John - really well done. Oh - how on earth did you manage to keep your cool with that total bigot? He belongs to another century or planet! Best wishes Clive
Just to say I saw the show tonight, and had to email, well done for putting up with that moaning idiot Andrew (who I wanted to strangle on your behalf), I dont think I would have been that patient, you came across really well as a genuine and nice person. I hate the way people can be judgemental on people in the sex industry. Your place looks fantastic and you deserve to do well.
Mistress Rose :) Hampshire dominatrix
Huy Guys,
I have just seen you two lovely people on TV in some BB prog I clicked over to.
WOW!!! I was blown away, as a hetro female OAP in Yorkshire, I have to say well done, keep on doing what you are doing. That brash money grubbing man just didn't get understand at all, it would have threatened his image of himself if he had done. You are both wonderful, and yes it only took minutes to discover how fab you are.lol. I know you will keep going because the world needs people like you, I just had to say well done, now the adds have finished and you are back on so must close.
More power to you both.
Love and peace,
Estelle
Dear Mr John Bellamy
Just been watching 3 in a bed and i must say the chap ( Andrew) who only paid you £18 per person per room is pardon the phrase a knob !, what you do to cater for the gay and bisexual man is fantastic and the 7 weeks free for HIV people is comendable.
I myself are not gay but i had to email yourself to say that what you do, what you offer is fantastic and please dont listen to the knob Andrew.
All the best
Lance
LOVE IT LOVE IT................. You came across fabulus just as you are
End of part one,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,i,m loving it cant wait to see what the twat says about your place His nose is well out of joint .......oh i loved the fact that his wife agreed with you in saying what do u now about the sex indistry to the twat ...........right coffee and waiting for the next part ...........................End of part two,,,,,,,,,,,awwwwwwwwww very moving stew and clair are fab love them .................the twat is geting on my wick
you and Kris came across very well ham hall looks fab on Tv as well..........right large Gin and waiting for part three....... Send the twat some birds with lots of feathers lol
oh his so obnoxsuse (cant even spell it) the book it a lovely thought (his still a twat)
I realy loved the program and its a joy to say that you and Kris are dear friends see ya on Friday x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x
Hi John,
My wife and I (yes we're straight) have been watching the tv show - Mate keep it up !! We love your philosophy on life and applaud you! :) We think you and your hotel are lovely and our only gripe is that you're exclusive to gay and bisexual men - if you weren't we'd love to stay!
Well done for how you handled that awful fat bigot - he really is a pain in the arse!
We think you, you're hotel and what you are doing is great! Keep the faith and stay strong....
Kindest regards,
Clive and Tania.
Dear John & Christian, Have just seen 3 in a bed – expect you have had loads of mail but had to put in my four penn’th. I’m a 57 yr old straight, spiritual student, partially pagan lady accountant from Suffolk. Uuuh that vile man! Won’t waste too many words on him – calling him a cunt or an arsehole would be insulting to those most wondrous and multifunctional parts of our amazing anatomy Nothing amazing about that man – narrow and prejudiced and FEARFUL as you say – a rip off merchant ! That B & B wasn’t worth £250 or anything like it. He was taking advantage of the 3500 year old stones around him – and as for seeing a clitoris in the stone……. Maybe that’s the only chance he get’s to see one ))))) Interestingly my partner & I were at Avebury last year and noted that it didn’t have the warmth, or spiritual atmosphere of much smaller and unknown places. Like the witchcraft museum in Boscastle – it’s tiny but you come out of the building with the most wonderful feeling – and I’m not saying that because of any pagan links – people whisper in there rather than disturb the beautiful peace. The British museum in London does not have that. You must check it out if you’re down that way. Shut up Libby – you’re rambling. The love and care and honesty that you put in for your guests is wonderful – I have an old Arena documentary of Quentin Crisp where he remarks that he lives in one of the last houses “that is run for the benefit of the lodgers” – I thought of that when you explained how and why you run your business. Also, I thought about Jesus – who hung out with tax collectors, prostitutes and the hoi polloi – and had some very definite messages for the “Andrews” of his time. When my father went to Canada leaving my mum pregnant in 1950, the only person who offered help was a prostitute from a neighbouring flat in Ladbroke Grove in London - who came round with a £5 note. “here you are dear - I saw ‘im go”. Silly proud mother thanked her but didn’t take it and lived on porridge for 2 weeks. I’m not banging a drum for the “good hearted tart” – it was just a story of people caring for each other – and a story of courage …. On both sides. But John, Christian, you get it don’t you. Andrew doesn’t get it – like all those who think a new car or the last word in 3 piece suites will make them happy. It doesn’t ! That’s why he is not happy and tries to get boosts from standing on our fingers. We know what makes us happy. Spirit is peace and ecstasy – but we are not abandoned here without a way of tasting our inheritance in this physical world, through the body, through giving, through caring and loving. There are places in the world where women are thought of as third class, dirty, chattels, etc and yet we’ve always existed, just as the many aspects and degrees of men’s and womens sexuality have always existed – and still are persecuted - good for you for standing up to be counted ! Sorry chaps, didn’t mean too get so emotional about it. I wish you love always, the Goddess provides for those who provide for others. I’ll never know you but – we know we’re here for each other. With love and hugs Libby Baker
AND MORE
Dear John,
I'm sure you'll get plenty of mail after your appearance on Three in a Bed, some (hopefully most!) positive and some ignorant and hateful, so I don't expect a reply because I doubt you'll have time.I'm not gay or male, but I have lived in some of the most prejudiced and most liberal parts of the world and know only a little about the challenges that gay men can face in any community, even in this modern-thinking (supposedly) world.I just wanted to let you know that while your sexually open and expressive establishment might not be to everybody's tastes, I think that what you're doing is fantastic. If at the end of my life, I could look back and know that I'd given even half of the comfort, acceptance and peace of mind that you seem to be giving, I'd be a happy girl.
The fact that you're open about being a sex professional I think is also admirable. I do think that there is a horrible, seedy side to the industry, when young people are being exploited and victimized, but otherwise I don't see any reason for people to judge. Hopefully, by your being so open, a few more people will open their minds a little.Sorry for going on and on, I've had a couple of glasses of wine.Well done, you're lovely and if I were a gay or bi man I would totally come and stay with you. xo Emily
hi, just wanted to write and let you know , I watched the 3 in a bed tv programme last night and altho I am not a gay male,(or lesbian),I thought I must write to let you know that you and your hotel came across wonderfully.
What a fantastic and unique service you appear to offer your clients! Fair play to you!!!! - I think you should have won!!!!!!!!
Wishing you every success in the future.
Regards
Janice Moxham P.S. I do not normally write to people but you inspired me!!!!!!
John: I'v got me popcorn and fanta ready and got some friends coming round, Gorden brown has said he will pop in to seei t , the Queen and Prince Philip have told me they will be away but they are going to get William to download it and they will watch it at a later date x x x Roy
Well, well, well - just finished watching "3 in a bed" and thoroughly enjoyed it whilst finding it enlightening too. Who's the biggest queen you ask - hmmmmmmmmm. That Andrew..... at least you didn't ask for non allergenic pillows at the last moment - and the teddy.... and the "pose" in the jimjams with the strategically placed duvet - AAAAAAARGH. That, and the attitude and undermining - jeez - he really does deserve himself. Let's not be unkind though - as an old schoolmaster once said of me in a school report "if ignorance is bliss, this boy will be truly happy". As much as I appreciate that sentiment with the underlying humour, Andrew may have to re-evaluate his thought processes methinks. GOOD. The other two were lovely and so warmed to you - what a super place they had too.
JON
I saw your retreat on Three In a Bed and I just wanted to say I think you offer a great retreat and your passion for what you provide is lovely to see. As a woman I sadly won’t be able to enjoy your accommodation or any of your workshops – they looked really interesting. After seeing women go wild at a Chippendales show I can see why you would not want women in a place where men can be clothes optional! ;0)
You handled the criticism levelled at you so well and explained your philosophy very clearly. As a veggie ( vegan really) I was very embarrassed by my “fellow” vegetarian’s attitude to what you are offering to gay men. We still live in far from equal times so it’s great that there are places like yours where people can be themselves without fear of judgement or prejudice and the fact you run it as a not for profit venue is fantastic. I’ve never sent a congratulatory e-mail to someone I don’t know before but your care for your retreat was so delightful to see I thought you deserved to be praised for it. I wish you all at Hamilton Hall the best for the future and hope that the programme really projects Hamilton Hall into the spotlight as you deserve to be recognised for both your passion and your compassion.
Rebecca
Well done John, the programme was great. Wasnt sure if you were going to play it up or be very quiet and timid, but you were just yourself and had every right to complain about that Andrew who was clearly just ripping everyone off. We have probably been down at least 30 times between the 2 of us in the last 10 years and spend around 30X£150 - ie given you around £4,500, and I can certainly say that we have always had good value and lets face it 18 nights in his place just doesent come near to what you have offered in all the weekends we have enjoyed. Well you can be sure that everyone saw him as unrealistic and a gready b&b owner- the other couple and yourself & Christian all came out of it well. Lets hope it brings you some well deserved extra business!
Keep it up for the next 10 years and hope to see you soon
Ian & Nick
Hi John, for you to go to the trouble of personal replies when you have been inundated with good wishes like you have, is a testimony to you. Does the "hall" have a facebook group or other ways to keep in touch? I understand that you can not dilute your work, but a lot of straight people do care and whilst not wanting to
block your work, would like to keep in touch/updated. I wasn't going to dignify that bloke by mentioning him but seeing as you have, he's an asshole and I bet his 'phone hasn't begun ringing never mind never stopped! I loved the bit in the programme when Andrew was whinging and you said something like "coffee's on" I watched the programme twice as it was very good, you are in the thoughts and prayers of the sane world and held in their love as you know. I have 2 brothers one like Andrew and one who's gay. I remember the gay one saying about how when you are young and new to the scene you sometimes go home with an old queen for a bed for the night when you are in the city and can't get home. I know that's not what you're about (a flop house) but also that if a young person rang you scared they'd be room and a listening ear. You are there for people no matter what there circumstances and it is that what makes Hamilton Hall special. Amanda xxx
Hiya,
Just watched "3 in a bed" last night and would just like to tell you how much I enjoyed it. Im not a guy,and i aint gay but i thought what you do is an inspiration in this day and age. Loved you teasing that pratt from £250 place and not a bit of meat!!! whats going on there?
But you really did make me laugh and cheered me right up. I was glad the idiot didnt win with his button mushroom breakfast YUK! I just loved that you and the others from northumberland were just straight talking down to earth people doing a job you love,and while you may not always be in profit I'm sure people hold you dear!!
Keep up the good work,and heres to your next 10 years
Hi John Saw you in that show! Just wanted to say to you that I thought you, quite brillianly, stood up to that hulking menace masquerading as a 'nice guy'!? And came out on top - if you get my drift! LOL Wow - did you let him have it! I was behind you all the way and it is quite refreshing to see someone as bigoted as that guy being publicly eviscerated and well and truly trumped! I think you actually did him a favour in helping him to actually look at himself in the mirror. Thanks for standing up for everyone who just happens to be different and being totally honest about it. Congratulations and very best wishes from myself and my partner, Richard, of 25 years. We will keep in touch as we may be, by coincidence, be opening a B&B in Bournemouth at some point, specialising in surfing package holidays - of all things! Ciao!
I'm sure you will be inundated with positive feedback after the TV programme was aired last night, but I for one was totally touched and humbled by your ethos, passion, compassion and outlook on life. Thank heavens for people like you, as it makes the world a much nicer place to be. Best Wishes Jan
Hi Guys We are dropping you a line from Australia after watching 3 in a bed on the internet last night - we just had to wish you all the best! Loved the show, very well set up for a bit of controversy, but you handled it so well. We cried with you when Clair & Stuart gave you more than your tariff charge...they were right on the mark! You are very special people doing something positive & wonderful...please know that you are appreciated & admired for it :). Love to you both Deb & Jeremy (Perth Australia) xxxx
i Jon and Christian, just a quick note to say that I thought you really shone in 3 in a bed, gracious and understanding, i hope that Hamilton Hall continues to go from strength to strength for you. Peter and I will be visiting Bournemouth in the next few months and really want to book in with you, we will let you know nearer to the time. Keep up the spiritual work and may the years ahead bring you joy, happiness and success.. best wishes Rich and Pete (Derby). By the way if you decide to have a charity dinner or fund raising function to support your charity work with people with aids and hiv related illness, please count us in.
Hi been trying to email you so you may receive too off them if so just take it as a compliment I owned a nice wee bed and breakfast in Ayr Scotland with my hubby it was great fun I'm a 51 year old woman who just felt I had to contact you both and say I think your attitude and kindness is great in this day and age hold your heads up high and keep up the good work I really wanted you two win 3 in a bed but I truly feel you are both winners anyway x All the best fae Bonnie Scotland Maggie White Cumnock Ayrshire the world would be a far nicer place if there were more folk like you both in it I toast you with a wee glass of vino .
John
Well played , I do not think I have smiled though a program so much , well done really enjoyed it and your personality , I do hope Michelle and I can meet you one day , I really think you had a lot of dignity and class in the show well done.
All the Best Steve
Dear John,
I'm in the middle of watching three-in-a-bed on channel four and I felt compelled to email you, hopefully you will read this. I'm a 23 year old straight woman with a very open mind and lots of gay friends. I've noticed amongst my friends that although the attitude and bad feeling towards them is often hidden, the prejudices and misunderstanding is still there under the surface. No matter how out and proud they are a lot of their lives is still lived 'underground'. To watch you being so honest and open about your sexuality and lifestyle is both refershing and absolutely admirable. To invite strangers and indeed a film crew into your private life and your sanctuary of a B&B takes strength in the extreme (not to mention brass balls). Your attitude towards your business is fantastic and I think that the people who stay with you know for sure that you genuinely care about their happiness and well being. Your place is beautiful, as is your attitude, in a world full of concrete high rises and corporate fat cats that marginalise anoyone who doesn't fit into the 'husband and wife with 2.5 children' mould I can't help but think of businesses and attitudes like yours as a rainbow striped gem in a drab grey world.
Keep up the good work!! Lots of love, Ellie xxx
Hello!
I just watched the programme and I just wanted you to know that I think what you do is amazing. It truly reaffirms my faith in humankind when I hear of such kindness, generosity of spirit and selflessness. Keep up your wonderful work - you are Britons to be proud of!
Truly, Susan Allardyce
Hi John
Just wanted to drop you a line to say that my girlfriend and I have just watched "3 in a bed" on BFBS (British Forces Broadcasting Services) in Gibraltar.
We thought you were fantastic! We are only sad that we are 'tackle-less' and therefore unable to visit you and your tranquil retreat but understand fully your quest.Life can be very lonely as a gay couple in a homophobic world (which some B&B owners appearing on 3 in a bed would clearly not understand!)
We so admire the work that you are doing and would like to encourage you to enjoy and fulfill your destiny (your words!) and keep up the good work!With love and light Helen and Zoe
x
Hello, I felt compelled to get in touch after watching you appear in three in a bed(watching it from sunny Gibraltar via the British Forces TV service). I wanted to say that I completely understand your ethos and the service y! ou are offering. I felt from the programme that you had genuine empathy and understanding and it was refreshing to see alternatives to what is considered the "norm" in today's dog eat dog society. You may also be interested that I am completely heterosexual married with three children, but I think you are a gem. You and your assistant manager offer valuable friendly environment to those most at need. Good luck with your future ventures. God bless. Victoria
Like a lot of you out there, I have a Mother who is now 87 and has just moved from her warden assisted flat to a nursing care home as her mental and physical health mean she is not able to look after herself any longer, and at the moment she is in hospital, and when I saw her today it made my heart weep. Her bladder infection has led to her dementia getting much worse and while she is on the antibiotics she is somewhere else completely. When she comes to be well enough to leave the hospital, her condition has now deteriorated so fast that the care home is now not suitable so she is moving into a nursing home, and this will be her last move.
She was in bed and very distressed - staring out of unseeing eyes that do not seem to focus, grabbing with her hands at anything and everything close - ie: the bars at the side of the hospital bed had been put up to keep her in bed as she kept sliding out and staggering up the ward - and it is quite a distressing site for many to witness - and she is chattering away - with words that do not follow any cohesive sense and while she knew my name and - kind of - that I was her son - all sorts of other family members names came into it and I don't really think she knew me, and this was a first. Her confused state of mental health was awful to witness.
My Mother - a bright, intelligent fashion model who was one of London's top models in the 1940's and 1950's and who also sang with many famous dance bands for she had a superb voice - and who raised 3 children, is now reduced to this.
A tall proud women with a voice and an opinion of her own and no fear of speaking her mind,- a woman who was married 3 times during her life and who put up with a lot,- a woman who has lived alone for over 20 years since my Step Father died and who lost her only daughter ( my sister ) and her baby ( my niece ) 18 years ago when both died a few months apart ,- a women who has always been accepting of my gay lifestyle and who loved my friends and boyfriends even if not being as accepting of my brothers wife - always being a dreadful mother-in-law and a women who all those 'mother-in-law jokes' must have been written about,- and a woman who has been stubborn, difficult and sometimes a women who would make the angels cry because GOD she could NEVER admit fault and take responsibility and simply apologize and a woman who has caused much family turmoil because of her refusal - point blank refusal - to ever accept that she was ever wrong about anything - and a woman who admitted to me some years ago that she had never been in love - never really knew what love was and that - despite being married 3 times and raising a family, had never really understood what that mysterious word 'love' - had meant - and while in her way she has loved and has been loved, she never really comprehended what it meant, and for that, I feel desperately sorry.
Sorry that she never understood how we - her children - felt about her and sorry that she always felt the need to - somehow - try and manipulate the situation to suit herself all the time. Sad that she never realised we would do whatever she wanted because we loved her and not because she was being manipulative. Sad that she always thought every situation was about her and sad that she felt such jealously and resentment towards anyone who 'stole her limelight' - even her own grandchildren. Sad that she resented her son being a sensational husband and father to his children and sad that she felt such resentment towards those who had something she felt she had lost out on, when the truth was - she hadn't - for she was loved - she was very cared for - and while she never understood this and while she felt alone and unloved, other people were hurt and betrayed by her time and time again because she simply didn't get it. She never really understood,- and that saddens me.
Poor Betty - my poor Mother, and as much as we have told her over the years and as much as we have openly shown our affection and considered her in our lives - she still never got it - never realised and never allowed herself to be part of the family - preferring to isolate herself and say that she wasn't wanted all the time when the exact opposite was the truth, and we just got fed up with it.
Now to see her this way, saddens me. For whatever it was she lost - and whatever it was she lacked - and for all her mistakes and all her selfish ways, she is my Mother, I love her dearly, and no-one - NO -ONE - should be put through this kind of thing at the end of their lives and the cruelty metered out by a government and health authority SO AGAINST EUTHANASIA beggars belief. My Mother would not have wanted this, and with a society where 80% of people asked agree that euthanasia is the best thing in some situations such as this, I pray she will not suffer longer than necessary and where she can be with my sister, her family and Jesus - in peace - soon.
I love her too much to allow anything else to happen to her.
Kristian has been little angel working all sorts of long hours getting this new web site up and running. I have an IT guy, Ben, who started the ball rolling with this new site and then Kristian took it upon himself to learn the pro gramme and ask Ben all sorts of questions that went entirely over my head ( and no - I am not blond... ) and we are on track to open another sister web site in a month or so with all the articles, editorials etc. that you all seem to read so much.
So BIG THANK YOU to Kristian and Ben for all their hard work and fr their patience when I worked long hours as well learning the hard way and making all sorts of mistakes and barking at the computer...
